Who Am I?

Instead of asking a person close to us “what would you say about me if I died tomorrow?” we should maybe impose the question of, “Would you say that I am kind, generous, a good parent, spouse (or whatever words we wish to describe ourselves) if I was gone tomorrow?"

If the person has hesitation, or honestly says no, we can work to achieve those descriptions. Another way to look at it is to ascribe to be a certain way and then ask if we are meeting our goal. If we wish to be described a certain way – humorous, funny, loving, goofy, fun, brainy, smart, pretty, or a good engineer, writer, Realtor or businessman, it should be a goal to act or do in the way that could be described as such.

The reason for the question is my recently being "stuck" with the Metro section of the Sunday paper. As I browsed through the obituaries, I noted all of the lovely prose about the now deceased. Were these people truly as they were described? Had they written their own obitiuaries, or at least contributed to them before they died? Will I like my own obituary?

Once, in a Mary Kay training session, or maybe a church-related retreat, we were asked to write our own obit. The task I have detailed, of describing yourself and then living up to it was the point. If you want to be described in a certain way, act it. If there is a description about yourself that you don't like (which may be true) change it to avoid the description in your obit. Although I doubt anyone has ever been called selfish or a nag in their post-mortem portrayal.